Only One Road

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So I sat down late last night and had an epiphany. A sudden inspiration came to me and I couldn’t sleep until I finished it. I don’t know if you guys know, but I’m religious – more specifically, I’m a Presbyterian. However, not many people know, because I rarely proclaim it and I don’t I live the way a Presbyterian should. I try and try again to win the fight inside of me, but I lose most of the time. I put God in the sidelines and I put my interests first. I’m in my junior year of high school now, and I’ve hit a wall. I can’t remember anything or retain any knowledge whatsoever. It’s almost time for AP Testing and I can’t do anything. I’m overwhelmed with stress and I just can’t seem to focus. And then yesterday night, this poem just came to me and well… I’ll let you guys read it for yourselves:

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No, YOU’RE Crazy

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Long time no blog, fellow strangers on the internet! It’s been awhile since my last upload, which was just a compliation of my past work. Well, this blog post is just about another one of my poems. It’s just a short one I wrote for my Psychology class. I managed to write it in twelve minutes (that’s a new record for me)! Anyway, here it is:

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Hey, Do You Remember When…?

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As I was organizing things in preparation for the finals tomorrow (yes, it’s that cruel and most stressing time of year again), I found some poems I wrote back in good old 8th grade and something I wrote quite recently. Well, if you want to read them, here it is:

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I Sassed a Teacher and Lived to Tell the Tale

One ordinary day, I was feeling extra sassy for some reason. I came into History class, sat down, and waited quietly until class started, like a good model student….
Okay, long story short, I was raising my hand(elbow on the desk) to ask a question. He didn’t see my hand and was about to move on until some guy pointed out that I was raising my hand.

Teacher: “Oh. That’s… a hand?” <– Trying to justify his mistake of overlooking my low-raised hand

Me: Well, it’s not a foot.

Yes, and like the mature AP students my classmates were, they started going “OOOOOHHH. BURRN”. For a moment, I felt like I completely lost my chance of getting a letter of recommendation from him as well as falling in his disfavor.

ILLUSTRATION: Scared girl

(My inner mind at that very moment)

Contrary to my thoughts, he just laughed it off and said, and I quote: “Sassy. I like it.”

What a cool teacher right? Most teachers are all about respect. If you dissed them, you would probably be given a detention and at the worst-case-scenario, be sent to the principal for a “talk” about your “issues”.

Yes, and that is the end to my interesting tale. I managed to sass a teacher in his lair and come out unscathed. Not much of rant, but I thought I should share this. Thank you for reading and have a wonderful life.

P.S. It’s my friend’s birthday soon and I’m kind of worried about what to get her. Any suggestions? She’s turning sixteen, she likes the color green, she’s Hispanic, uhm… errr… she’s an athlete (more specifically a swimmer), and well, that’s all I can think of right now. Please leave some suggestions in the comments!

School Has Come Back to Haunt Me…

So I haven’t been posting anything lately, because I decided to quit this blog. It was first created for a grade in English class, so honestly, I thought of blogging as homework. Well, my wonderful sophomore year is over now, and it’s no longer for a grade. I haven’t posted anything for about three to four months now, and it’s been about five weeks school started. I’ll just say this straight- I am STRESSED and I’m ready to snap in two right now.  Everyday is the same thing – homework, homework, and MORE homework. Interesting enough, I had an assignment in which I had to write about my favorite activity and why I did this certain activity. Well, I had nothing to write about. Why? BECAUSE I HAVE NO TIME FOR LEISURELY ACTIVITIES.  So many of you (or however many viewers we have left) are probably guessing that I’ll be using blogging as an excuse to rant. Well, you couldn’t be more correct. If you want to continue reading about probably one of the most nerdiest, fun-deprived, exhausted, and cranky teenage girl, then you are right where you want to be.

Stressed - image of me

(You have no idea how accurate the image above is of me). Anyways, until I have something painful and stressing in my life that might amuse you internet surfers, I must be going now to study for a quiz. Thank you and have a wonderful life.

After the Night, the Sun Shines the Brightest

As human beings, the night for us evokes fear. The dark is scary and unknown; something could be lurking around in it, ready to attack whenever it feels like it. Walking down a dark street at night, every wave of wind brushing past against the skin, every raspy scratch heard by the ears, sends the mind into a frantic stage, wanting to run and hide. The darkness of the night isn’t humanity’s greatest friend. However, somehow, in the night, there are things called stars; in the night, there are now electrical lights invented by humans; in the night, there is a moment when the sun rises up, and then and there, a magic happens: a light bright enough to light up the whole sky and earth, driving away the night.

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You Want My Shoes? Well, You Can’t Have Them (Without a Fight).

Was there ever a time when someone demanded for something, but you refused, knowing very well they were going to get what they wanted anyway? This happens between me and my mom once every two weeks. She demands I clean the house, I refuse, and then she threatens to kick me out. I end up cleaning anyway, yet I ALWAYS stubbornly decline, putting it off as long as possible without being forced to sleep in the streets. You may view me as a rebellious teenager that’s too lazy to do house cleaning every two weeks, but honestly, this applies to all humans and even animals.

In Night, there was a particular scene that perked my interest. At the concentration camp, a tent leader’s aide tried bribing the main character (author) for his shoes – the only things he had left. Realizing the aide really liked his shoes, he refused to let him have it. In the end, the shoes got taken away from him anyway, in exchange for nothing. When I first read this scene, I felt that the main character was being somewhat foolish. He could have traded his shoes for some food, but stubbornly, he refused to let the aide have them until they were taken away by force. And then I realized what the author was trying to argue against. Reading the scene now, I feel that if I was in the author’s shoes, I would do the exact same thing as he did. I can relate to how he was feeling then or at least guess what he was feeling, since he was about my age and probably was as stubborn as I am. He didn’t want to give them something they liked, something that they wanted. After making his life a living Hell, he wasn’t just going to simply hand over something they desired. No, he was going to refuse until he couldn’t. He didn’t care about the extra portion of food he was going to get in exchange for the shoes, it was food served by the enemy after all. His refusal, ridiculous as it seemed over a pair of shoes, was his way of fighting back. It was his way of saying, “You want my shoes? Too bad, I’m not going to just hand them over to you. You’re going to work for it. You’re going to get them eventually, but not without a struggle”. He knew it was a futile effort, but fighting back, refusing to let them have their way, was in itself satisfying enough.

fight back

Animals experience this all the time. When their predators try to get them, they run as fast as they can or put up their defenses. Sometimes, it’s like fighting a losing battle – they’re going to win no matter what. But doing nothing will only add to the opposing side’s satisfaction. You need to fight, struggle with all your might, and give them a hard time. Even if in the end, you lose, at least you can feel content about making the other side work for the win. Even if you lost, as least you can tell yourself, “Oh well. I tried my best. I didn’t just hand them the win on a silver platter, I gave them somewhat of a hard time.”

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Pictures from:

 http://mikemcclaughry.wordpress.com/2012/05/17/psychological-warfare-the-art-of-creating-insanity-mirroring/

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Rebellion